Haters Gonna Hate: The Sorrowful Story of Chardonnay by Tom Bicknell

So what do we know about Chardonnay?

We know that it’s one of the most widely planted grapes in the history of viticulture.
We know that its origin is thought to be Burgundy.
We know that it is a bone of contention for many wine drinkers.
We also know that it is responsible for some of the most awesome wines on Earth and is an all-around bloody brilliant grape.  Yet never before has a simple grape managed to divide the wine drinking community quite as much as this little baby. 

So why the hate?

Lets have a little look at the history of the almighty Chardonnay, and see if we can find any answers.

One theory on the ancestry of Chardonnay involves a trip to the Middle East. Lebanese and Syrian winemakers argue that Chardonnay was taken to Europe by the returning Crusaders. However, there is little evidence to suggest this theory is true.

What Beauties?  Chardonnay Grapes up close

A more likely scenario, assisted by modern DNA fingerprinting techniques, suggest Chardonnay is a cross between Pinot Blanc, commonly grown by the French aristocracy, and Heunisch, a grape variety thought to be brought over to France by the Romans; the Pinot being the grape of choice for the aristocracy, and Heunisch being widely cultivated by French peasants. Due to the close proximity of the vines, they had plenty of chances to interbreed. As the parent plants were so genetically distant, a process called heterosis took place and the resulting hybrids became kind of Incredible Hulk-esque and became more powerful than you could imagine. 

---Sorry to interrupt Tom but it’s time for some Science:

Heterosis or hybrid vigour refers to the phenomenon that progeny of diverse varieties of a species or crosses between species exhibit greater biomass, speed of development, and fertility than both parents (Birchler et al. 2010, The Plant Cell).  While it occurs in both plants and animals, there is no consensus as to the underlying mechanisms for heterosis (is it a case of dominance, overdominance, or pseudo-overdominance?).  However, it could prove to be an interesting tool to help increase agricultural productivity.  Different research groups dealing with the issue of increasing crop productivity reached conclusions that the solution lies in improved biomass production by way of enhanced light capture and use efficiency, modified photosystem biochemistry, and improved partitioning of assimilates to the economic part of the plant all of which can be achieved through the process of heterosis (Blum 2013, Journal of Experimental Botany).

---Alright Alex, don’t go all Stephen Hawking on us! Chill!

How about looking at Chardonnay from a viticultural point of view?

Chardonnay has a wonderful reputation for being a bit like a sponge. The surroundings, climate, soil, and even the winemaker all have a massive influence on the resulting wine. Chablis is a perfect example of this. The majority of Grand Cru vineyards in Chablis (Burgundy) are planted on predominantly limestone and chalk, giving the wine itself a fantastic minerality.  Jancis Robinson MW even goes so far as to say that Chablis is the most true and pure expression of the Chardonnay grape.

It’s pretty straight-forward to cultivate, and can easily be manipulated to behave how you want it to.  For instance, it’s an early budding vine, which means it can be susceptible to frost damage. One way this was countered in Burgundy was to give the vines an aggressive pruning just before they try to do their thing, which shocks the vine into holding back on budding usually for about 2 weeks once the danger has passed and the warm weather kicks in.

So far we’ve learned that Chardonnay is easy to grow, historically significant, and a bit like a blank slate. So why does this make people hate the little guy?

Oz Clarke said that Chardonnay is “...the ruthless coloniser and destroyer of the world's vineyards and the world's palates." While I do not agree that Chardie is responsible for destroying the worlds palate, I do agree with his view that Chardonnay was an invader. Countless acres of indigenous varieties were pulled up all over the world to accommodate this newly popular, easy-to-pronounce, easy-to-make-into-wine variety that was taking the world by storm.

Italy and Spain were hit incredibly hard by this, both seeing ancient Negroamaro, Primitivo, Grenache and Mataro vines ripped up in favour of new plantings of Chardonnay.

The new world will also have a share of the blame for the anti-Chardonnay attitudes seen around the world. 

"Borrowed" Chardonnay

A story that I find hilarious about early Chardonnay wine making in Australia is that of Murray Tyrell, based in the Hunter Valley. His entire vineyard was planted from cuttings that he “borrowed” from Penfolds, by hopping their fence at night and giving their vines a bit of a prune… This then went on to become one of the most commercially successful Chardonnays ever. Brilliant, only in Australia!

Now thankfully I’m too young to remember this, but when Chardo-mania hit the world in the mid to late 80s popularity increased across the world, so did demand. Australian farmers simply could not keep up, and had to cut a few corners to continue to meet the demand. One of these corners was adding “filler” varietals, such as Semillon and Colombard to pad out the dwindling supply of Chardonnay grapes. Sadly, the quality went down. And to save time, a lot of winemakers were using oak chips or staves instead of extended barrel ageing. Giving us wines with incredibly acrid and abrasive (verging on abusive) oak flavours. 

In the early 90s Australian Chardonnay, once the farmers had sorted themselves out, was in a wonderful place – polar opposite of the Burgundian style. These wines were big, loud, shouty fruit-bombs, rich and voluptuous with huge hits of tropical fruit. Very appealing to the modern wine-consumer. Over the course of the next 5 years, Chardonnay planting down under increased fivefold. Chardonnay was now seen as ‘fashionable.’

But why would this cause people to recoil in fear when you suggest they try a Chardonnay?

Well, as with all things that become incredibly popular the producers realised they didn’t really need to treat their wine with the respect it deserved. People were still going to buy it by the gallon.

This is where the New Worlds tendency (and the Old Worlds reluctance) to label the variety on the bottle, in my opinion, did the most damage.  Let’s say you buy an Aussie chard from the supermarket and it’s rubbish. Then you do the same thinking it was just a blip and buy another bottle of rubbish. Eventually you’ll tar all Chardonnays with the same brush and develop the mindset that “Chardonnay sucks! I’ll just stick to what I know I like”, even if what you like is a Chardonnay masquerading behind a French word like “Pouilly-Fuissé”, “Mâconnais” or “Chablis.”

Even in 2013 working in wine retail I see examples of this on a weekly basis. One of my favourite questions to be asked at work is “Can you recommend me a wine? I don’t like chardonnay, but really like Chablis” – this makes me both happy and sad. Sad because Chardonnay has been unfairly stigmatized, but happy because people are still enjoying it even if they’re ignorant to what they’re actually drinking.

So next time you’re buying wine and see a Chardonnay, don’t be afraid.  Give in to temptation. 

Do as Kath, Kim & Kylie would do, kick back with a lovely glass of C(h)ardonnay - remember the "H" is silent...it’s nice, it’s different, it’s unusual.